MAN OF HONOR

A definite role played by a human being from your past who made you feel the essence of life., when you you were raw in the world…

FATHER SAM
Blessed was the day when he found me at a missionary camp. He then brought me to his church,  that night,the years infertile jasmine plant on his church ground blossomed. So how I was named!! …

after the church sessions , he would introduce me to few families so that I get one. But as I grew up , we were so bonded that he never wanted to give up on me, we were happy . I remember when I was around three, a christian couple wanted to adopt me,but he refused.

And when he took me out in the evening , I used to demand outside food, how we used to get one plate food and share, and after a bite ,he would take a deep heavy breath and say “I’m full”…he got me fine old dress from the families that attended his church.. and on my birthday ,( that is the day I came to the chruch) we borrowed pressure cooker to bake a cake. No one was invited , only us and few other church people..

Father sam was a true christian , he always found means and funds and contacts which can help benefit others.. he moralized me, he skilled me with values, he never gave any emphasis on religion. One day I asked him “ what is my religion??”He said” religion is a faith where we love our creator , the almighty” . if he wanted me to be a christian, he could have told me that I’m a christian … people sometimes would say that I’m a hindu as the missionaries who found me said so…

Later when it was time for me to go to school , he was worried , he wanted me to join a good school, for a year or so ,he used his money and some church fund to educate me… I went to a good school, found kids way too well-off… after school, he looked after my homework but then I used to end up asking him silly questions like “ why are we poor??” “who are my parents??’... he would talk about some light that will save me, he talked about angels, he feed me divinity…

When he was 55 , he was diagnosed with liver cancer, and that was the time he became serious about my adoption... I was five , after school I went to the hospital , he said a hindu family wants to adopt me, then he reaveled me the fact that I’m a hindu, the missionaries removed the steel ganesha locket (hindu idol) I wore … “religion is a faith ,isnt it father??.. and I have faith in you ”.. I was sent  with the family , they treated me good, they had all the wealth, way beyond my imagination… on Sundays I visited father, who was in his few last breath .. he was bald, his eyes bulged and dark circled , his belly swelled up like a pot , he vomitted very frequently… I remember how he tried his best to put up a smile when he saw me.. in his last few words , he sopke to me .he said me to always look for the light, and some day when I find it, I’ll be saved… that very day he died. After the rituals , I realised his absence, I could vision a solitary road I have to walk all by my own…but I certainly found the light that glowed and removed my life’s darkness..

FATHER SAM , the light was you.. YOU saved me..

sightless vision!!

eyes.. wait it is just no restricted to your lovers or loved ones.. everyone you meet, everyone you come across ... strangers.. frauds... friends .. foes..?!! do find  what they speak..how eyes express the thoughts thats goin n the psy-che.. what are the occult things ..the positive or negative rays that reflects from them....??
learn this eye- language before you are back stabbed!!*eye-winkS*
God bless!!
YEA m bored , n m lazy ..  I no i can do lot better .. :d

Killer thriller!!

Disclaimer : if associated with anyone’s life , then its pure actuality.This crime may not be judged as a felony by law , cause the killer is unacquainted of the person it killed. The person who has been killed, attempted a thought to kill the person who killed her.

But then…

Killing him would have killed the part that craves for him, but reality is, he is unique , and I wont find one more like him , so how kiilng him kills me….. If I kill the resources to reach him , missing him kills me….
The fact that he loves his girl friend kills me on a daily basis, if his girl friend is killed , it will kill him , so how i will be killed anyway…
If I kill myself , it won't kill him , and that again kills me…
If he kills his love, he will be killed just like me, which will in turn kill me in excess….
If I kill being superficially happy in front of him, his anger might kill him , and yet again I get killed…
If only universe kills my love, solitary would kill me all over again…if universe kill his love ,it will kill him,and for a numerous time, I will be killed..
If I kill him by sweetness, then diabetics might kill him , and hence I’m killed again..If I kill him by looks , he will use me , which will leave me further killed…If I kill him by confessions , he will hate me, obviously killing me extra…
If he stops killing me every now and then, not being killed , will kill me….
If I kill him by love, his girl friend would kill me , his girl friend being a killer will kill him and how more can I get killed??
Reading this post he might kill me, but how can he kill someone , who has been already killed by him..

Soo…

Kill me baby one more time !!


p/s : Geez, I need to start thinking of  more sensible  stuff .....

foreign to future !!

What if life was predictable , just the way you plan. You know the events of the day, people you meet,friends you make, the job you shall do, love of your life…and so on.what ever you desire is sketched by you in a conscious mind. In short if you were God to write your own fate.

There would be nothing termed as “ good luck” ,”surprise” , “ new “ , “excitement”. Doesn’t that sound utter flop and monotonous. Unpredictability is what keeps us moving. Every thing has to be balanced with time . so why your good and bad deeds are to be neutralised. If you don’t experience sorrow , how can you ever know what happiness is?? The measure of any feelings is the volatility of the events that we come across. I met this guy my parents want me to marry. Like always I was worried to take a decision of an existence. Just because he is an iim graduate does not make him any better as a husband , or in that case makes him worse for his busy schedule , but the changeability is what turned the things around..lucky may be.. he was sweetness, intelligence and good looks in a package. And a standard meter for all the dumb guys I thought were the face of perfection. It’s the irregularity we experience that revolutionize our views. And makes us judicious and selective to evaluate the finest among all.. and when to liberate the overwhelming hormones . ask a winner of a reality show , how was it for him to go through all the progression of time lag for the result.Or when you realise that stranger is your secret admirer. Or when an arrange marriage work out the most excellent.

A tranquil living might just leave us superbored. Unexpected situations helps us to accept changes, these are the situations that moulds and shapes your energy, hence how two different people have uncommon fortune and providence. Imagine identical twins , having identical genetic compositon ,lets say they even react to the situations in a similar fashion., if kept  in two distinctive environment differing in social and cultural activities. Now the change between them will be the difference in the occurrence of events in their life the other missed. So how individual luck and future differs. Why do we like a movie with twist and turns, its because something you never expect makes you feel good about the movie.

On some day you wake up , well aware of the time and tasks to be performed , you even prepare the night with loved ones. But an accident the very day leaves you crippled without any legs. You become arrogant , you hate yourself , you hate God,your lover breaks up with you .This is the time you would have thougt what if you were given an ability to design your destiny. But as we remember and encounter that life is not the way we set up.. but we have to match and deal with the capriciousness of the situations.
Being postive can terminate your problem . write down the impulsive story of your breath , in particular how did you make an effort to outlive your life,it will obviously  be worth listening to..who knows this might be that twist in your life’s movie, and might  serve the objective of your living. And you will never regret living it..

GET UP AND GET GOING . SPARKLE.

Man- made calamity!!

we were not supposed to cross our ways
dealt by fate,destiny gave us a chase..
Opposite like the poles , we met our soul

As charges in the magnetic field ..
At the centre of attraction ,The love was sealed…
The inclination rocked the ocean…

The world was classy but mean..
Our disparate religion , opressed their custom
He melted a few pieces , heart broken from the bottom..

The cursed iceberg , for summer, he prayed on his knee
I’m the titanic that sank down the sea….