I have been with him since five years, never saw him numb this way. His early arrival from office reflected all feelings , negative vibes jammed his throat and he cried,cried like a kid revolting against his parents verdict. I was amazed but without wasting a second to think why he didn’t place a soft kiss on my forehead, i hugged him instead, I knew something was wrong and this is my turn to take him away from his grief.
‘its ok,honey’ i said without knowing the reason why he was leaning against me and crying his eyes out.
Numerous questions cracked my head . did he cheat on me?? Has he fallen in love with someone else?? i struggled to let go his negative vibes upon me,..he hid his face fixed against me like a place where he was safe, and man enough to let his tears drain. ‘calm down baby’
He raised his head looked into my eyes , watching his tears made me feel unprotected , I never saw him this weak . ‘ i’m fired, i dont have a job anymore’ .. he looked at me thinking that a worst news has been delivered. Instead a sigh of relif that he still loves me.
‘ its ok ‘ i gently brushed off his hair from his forehead, but the matter of fact they fell upon the same place. ‘ tell me wat happened, i’m with you ,we will work it all out. I promise ‘
He turned away his face , as he was about to explain , i put my hand around his shoulder and made it a point it should be a conversation, i can’t see him break down.
And i Know him since the day he has been working ,going over and over the same thing ,the same job everyday made him misplace his years anger. His childhood best friend speaks of him as the wiz kid who has all the ways , the effective and short cut ways to success. how he topped his school,his college, but the one thing that drove him indifferent was being caught in a wrong job.
In a place where he could never revolutionize his thoughts. He hated acting the same everday . and his project manager called upon him to load more and more work that took his life and time with me which he said was the only thing he wanted as a constant.
That night i cooked him dinner ,he ate it silently even though our appetite crashed with the dejection that prevailed him ,no it prevailed us. And all night he gazed out at the stars , and I thought of leaving him alone but it was other way around i found myself so lonly , i could not see him this way , i hugged him and looked at the sky, the moon was glazing like the same night of our life when we were on the beach and promised eachother to stay together in sickness and in health.
And a reason agreeable enough for my smile ,’I LOVE HIM’.
