flight of fancy!!

A tight girp on the handle,
A tight base on the paddle

Salim compelled his tri cycle to move..
The passenger was content to heed his song.

“ sir, the road connects you and your love
And when you will hug her, you will smile,
Just like the time you saw her walk down the aisle,..”

The traveler in his overjoyed mood
Said Salim “you are a fine songster, dude”

He next asked to apply for indian idol
Salim knew ,high hope for a poor man is suicidal

But soon they talked about cat ,rat and mice
to Natter with customers always made him feel nice.

Some they talk, some are silent, and some rude,
But they forever said “you are a fine songster ,dude”

concluding the praises and gathering up courage
He set out and sang in indian idol auditions’ stage

Anu mallik and farah khan gave him a standing ovation
Ultimately, nation voted him the idol, celebration

But Salim was no where to be found
Citizens were waiting  to see him, crowned

And now why would I write further more
Better you find the skeptisim of the poem to core…

Blinded!!

An angel with fangs, serpent in my closet
Melodic his voice,soothing his words
Embraced with a smile ,crooked
Under a spell ,perplexed by charm.

Sweet- temper, that was flaunted
Hypnotized by that stare..
Two of a kind, join up, pair off…
A cryptic teen, I got fixed to..

The ugly plane, out of sight
That tall tale when stripped,
Horrifically cheerless, churned my faith
Yet, hell its no easy effort to escape…

Hormonal atyachar (torture)!!

Must have heard the two words - “love happens” ..haven’t you??


Its been  scientifically proved , falling in love is actually a massive explosion of a certain hormone that happens only once in a life time. .so why great poet and philosophers  say “ once in life, we fall in love”.. well said great people !!

Here, I talk about two of my friends .. Nilesh is a freak ,impulsive and single and quite popular in his college..Second is my friend atul, a rich n equally fashionable boy , he is in love with his classmate, he said he realized that the girl is his love, when there was only some day left for college to get over, and in the departure sunlight he realised this is the girl he wants to grow old with…

Third Ms deepika padukone (actress), she has the most striking smile with dimples even more stunning, makes her a pleasing blissful woman, and a note that she has a chronicle of being one of the hottest woman in the globe…

I gave both of them a snap of deepika and told them to potray her smile , eyes and her looks in words..Nilesh wrote a whole few pages, it described her physical appearance and utter flop poems and a bit of perversion… whereas Atul wrote what he saw , a fine smile with dimples .. he wrote few words but all the while he revealed the fact the thought that dominated his brain was his girl friend, her smile, her looks, her complete nature and especially the recollection of memories with his girl…

So if its true love,then attraction towards some hot and sexy personality is off beam, but a mate that gives you the backbone to stand by eachother and a desire to make a happy family with…

So when ppl in love have disagreements, they always give their relationship a second chance… but incase both of them don’t share the same feeling, if one moves out , the other is left heart broken , the shattered person never falls in love for the next time,..and the person subconsciously gets attracted towards an individulal who has a matching characteristc as the person he fell in lovewith.. but then we know what is the root reason that developed this attraction, a mind that permanently thinks vis- a -vis his first love..

p/s : respect love ,lovers and people in love…


love yah!! :D

MAN OF HONOR

A definite role played by a human being from your past who made you feel the essence of life., when you you were raw in the world…

FATHER SAM
Blessed was the day when he found me at a missionary camp. He then brought me to his church,  that night,the years infertile jasmine plant on his church ground blossomed. So how I was named!! …

after the church sessions , he would introduce me to few families so that I get one. But as I grew up , we were so bonded that he never wanted to give up on me, we were happy . I remember when I was around three, a christian couple wanted to adopt me,but he refused.

And when he took me out in the evening , I used to demand outside food, how we used to get one plate food and share, and after a bite ,he would take a deep heavy breath and say “I’m full”…he got me fine old dress from the families that attended his church.. and on my birthday ,( that is the day I came to the chruch) we borrowed pressure cooker to bake a cake. No one was invited , only us and few other church people..

Father sam was a true christian , he always found means and funds and contacts which can help benefit others.. he moralized me, he skilled me with values, he never gave any emphasis on religion. One day I asked him “ what is my religion??”He said” religion is a faith where we love our creator , the almighty” . if he wanted me to be a christian, he could have told me that I’m a christian … people sometimes would say that I’m a hindu as the missionaries who found me said so…

Later when it was time for me to go to school , he was worried , he wanted me to join a good school, for a year or so ,he used his money and some church fund to educate me… I went to a good school, found kids way too well-off… after school, he looked after my homework but then I used to end up asking him silly questions like “ why are we poor??” “who are my parents??’... he would talk about some light that will save me, he talked about angels, he feed me divinity…

When he was 55 , he was diagnosed with liver cancer, and that was the time he became serious about my adoption... I was five , after school I went to the hospital , he said a hindu family wants to adopt me, then he reaveled me the fact that I’m a hindu, the missionaries removed the steel ganesha locket (hindu idol) I wore … “religion is a faith ,isnt it father??.. and I have faith in you ”.. I was sent  with the family , they treated me good, they had all the wealth, way beyond my imagination… on Sundays I visited father, who was in his few last breath .. he was bald, his eyes bulged and dark circled , his belly swelled up like a pot , he vomitted very frequently… I remember how he tried his best to put up a smile when he saw me.. in his last few words , he sopke to me .he said me to always look for the light, and some day when I find it, I’ll be saved… that very day he died. After the rituals , I realised his absence, I could vision a solitary road I have to walk all by my own…but I certainly found the light that glowed and removed my life’s darkness..

FATHER SAM , the light was you.. YOU saved me..

sightless vision!!

eyes.. wait it is just no restricted to your lovers or loved ones.. everyone you meet, everyone you come across ... strangers.. frauds... friends .. foes..?!! do find  what they speak..how eyes express the thoughts thats goin n the psy-che.. what are the occult things ..the positive or negative rays that reflects from them....??
learn this eye- language before you are back stabbed!!*eye-winkS*
God bless!!
YEA m bored , n m lazy ..  I no i can do lot better .. :d

Killer thriller!!

Disclaimer : if associated with anyone’s life , then its pure actuality.This crime may not be judged as a felony by law , cause the killer is unacquainted of the person it killed. The person who has been killed, attempted a thought to kill the person who killed her.

But then…

Killing him would have killed the part that craves for him, but reality is, he is unique , and I wont find one more like him , so how kiilng him kills me….. If I kill the resources to reach him , missing him kills me….
The fact that he loves his girl friend kills me on a daily basis, if his girl friend is killed , it will kill him , so how i will be killed anyway…
If I kill myself , it won't kill him , and that again kills me…
If he kills his love, he will be killed just like me, which will in turn kill me in excess….
If I kill being superficially happy in front of him, his anger might kill him , and yet again I get killed…
If only universe kills my love, solitary would kill me all over again…if universe kill his love ,it will kill him,and for a numerous time, I will be killed..
If I kill him by sweetness, then diabetics might kill him , and hence I’m killed again..If I kill him by looks , he will use me , which will leave me further killed…If I kill him by confessions , he will hate me, obviously killing me extra…
If he stops killing me every now and then, not being killed , will kill me….
If I kill him by love, his girl friend would kill me , his girl friend being a killer will kill him and how more can I get killed??
Reading this post he might kill me, but how can he kill someone , who has been already killed by him..

Soo…

Kill me baby one more time !!


p/s : Geez, I need to start thinking of  more sensible  stuff .....

foreign to future !!

What if life was predictable , just the way you plan. You know the events of the day, people you meet,friends you make, the job you shall do, love of your life…and so on.what ever you desire is sketched by you in a conscious mind. In short if you were God to write your own fate.

There would be nothing termed as “ good luck” ,”surprise” , “ new “ , “excitement”. Doesn’t that sound utter flop and monotonous. Unpredictability is what keeps us moving. Every thing has to be balanced with time . so why your good and bad deeds are to be neutralised. If you don’t experience sorrow , how can you ever know what happiness is?? The measure of any feelings is the volatility of the events that we come across. I met this guy my parents want me to marry. Like always I was worried to take a decision of an existence. Just because he is an iim graduate does not make him any better as a husband , or in that case makes him worse for his busy schedule , but the changeability is what turned the things around..lucky may be.. he was sweetness, intelligence and good looks in a package. And a standard meter for all the dumb guys I thought were the face of perfection. It’s the irregularity we experience that revolutionize our views. And makes us judicious and selective to evaluate the finest among all.. and when to liberate the overwhelming hormones . ask a winner of a reality show , how was it for him to go through all the progression of time lag for the result.Or when you realise that stranger is your secret admirer. Or when an arrange marriage work out the most excellent.

A tranquil living might just leave us superbored. Unexpected situations helps us to accept changes, these are the situations that moulds and shapes your energy, hence how two different people have uncommon fortune and providence. Imagine identical twins , having identical genetic compositon ,lets say they even react to the situations in a similar fashion., if kept  in two distinctive environment differing in social and cultural activities. Now the change between them will be the difference in the occurrence of events in their life the other missed. So how individual luck and future differs. Why do we like a movie with twist and turns, its because something you never expect makes you feel good about the movie.

On some day you wake up , well aware of the time and tasks to be performed , you even prepare the night with loved ones. But an accident the very day leaves you crippled without any legs. You become arrogant , you hate yourself , you hate God,your lover breaks up with you .This is the time you would have thougt what if you were given an ability to design your destiny. But as we remember and encounter that life is not the way we set up.. but we have to match and deal with the capriciousness of the situations.
Being postive can terminate your problem . write down the impulsive story of your breath , in particular how did you make an effort to outlive your life,it will obviously  be worth listening to..who knows this might be that twist in your life’s movie, and might  serve the objective of your living. And you will never regret living it..

GET UP AND GET GOING . SPARKLE.

Man- made calamity!!

we were not supposed to cross our ways
dealt by fate,destiny gave us a chase..
Opposite like the poles , we met our soul

As charges in the magnetic field ..
At the centre of attraction ,The love was sealed…
The inclination rocked the ocean…

The world was classy but mean..
Our disparate religion , opressed their custom
He melted a few pieces , heart broken from the bottom..

The cursed iceberg , for summer, he prayed on his knee
I’m the titanic that sank down the sea….

j'aime tu!!

The times we laughed , the times we cried…
The times we fought, the times were never enough…
Crowded by many , but where is the one like you??
The smile that made my day ,you held me up wheneva I fell…
There for me always sharing my joy n tears…

Waving goodbyes', we did part our ways…
Its true time just flies by…
Don’t move further away , I want to know why…??
Hint me if this is love ….
Cause I never had a clue , for now m just feeling blue…

Story of a boy n a girl for sure,cause the feelings drain my tears…
I’m just lost in your eyes.. close to you ,safe forever….
Now I remember the arguments you let me win
Hah!! Just to realise , defeat was all mine..…
Kissing the memories , moment passes by...

Why is it not that easy?? Why is life so numb??
Why you never turned to believe my tears…
Pretending a smile , we walked a mile...
I don’t need reasons, I don’t blame you
I may not wait, I may stop believing in love…

yet a wish to find you in the crowd…
Thousand springs may it take but I ll look at you just the same…


.

me "ME"

IMPERCEPTIVE, Hit me
SLUGGISH, Push me
CALLOUS, Hate me

UNUTTERED, hear me
CHAINED, free me
DESPISED, love me

MENTAL RECOVERY

Friends!! fans!! followers!!


How much does it take to become a freedom writer ??..,whatever i write has a colossal part that reflects my life, For believe me i know every feeling born, made and faked on this earth. The reason why i don’t blame my past ,is what i’m is all because of what i have been through.. . and when i say “ I” then its just me who takes all the credit of being alive till date.

i know how it feels to be in rags , how an empty stomach roars for food, how it feels to be bullied ,neglected, rejected, unprotected, when you know your parents are wrong and you sincerely don’t want to follow them , how it feels to jump off of a cliff, i even know how the heart pounds in case of drug over doses.. I know how to fake a laugh for a joke but later cry my eyes out in the ladies room. I know how it feels to be a slow head, stumbling upon everything, ...laughed at .

if You call this mental illness... then may be ..haven’t i been through enough of trauma?? I mean Who doesn’t have a bad childhood , i bet everyone at some point of their life must have felt the unfair pricks..,not all should be registered in a mental asylum .

i was so much used to the feelings, but i knew this is not what i was born for ... the purpose of my life... a thought well enough to escape somewhere far away. . so did i ..

I call that a second chance rather a second life in one birth to live for. This time i learnt it from complete strangers. i copied the way they walked , and i never stumbled . their smile took my breath away , even though it was a tough time copying their smile as it reflected their heart, but i had my part of success. they adored me soon they became a part of my life. And strangers were no more strange .. then it felt -how it feels like to have friends and the one who loved you the most irrespective of your flaws .thats when i realised the worth having a friend.A best friend . I read books , like say millions of books ,explored whole of the world .. somebody just rightly said that books are a man’s best friend.. they took me to the zulu tribes of Africa , i met gregor johann mendel and studied his pea plants traits, i was murdered , i was sad ,i was happy, i cried,i laughed..trust me!! You can live a lifetimeby just reading books..

Times roll on and soon the feeling of missing those strangers turned friends , depressed me everyday. But unlike me,They were happy everywhere .

I know how you float after a hangover , i know how it feels like to be stonned and the world’s lackadaisical activities, never bothers you.. . how it feels to loose free your hair and shake it to the highest volume . How it feels when the weed makes you feel your nervous system. And how to blahber and abuse your past so that its flushed out of you like sh*t. yes i learnt how to become that B*TCH..

Yet when i laugh at one such joke , i realise it just the same way i was laughed at . suddenly the past rebellious tears flood out of my eyes.

If  you still call this mental illness , i would rather call it mental recovery...

OBJECTIVE REALITY ??

She was not acting as a silly neurotic woman who believes in every bit of superstition. But even if she thought the whole situation in a scientific way yet she could not solve the mysterious meaning . why was her hair moving in a rhythmic to and fro manner when there was no slightest motion of wind,why it felt like someone stared at her from some corner of the room , a force that jammed her voice so that she could not shout for help. But why will she ask for help ,does not the house belong to her. Vidhya didn’t want to entertain these feelings. She went to her bed room, but still she could feel the invisible presence of something supernatural .


She tried to get some sleep. Her heart skipped a bit, when she heard a strange voice “vidhyaaa”. The uneasiness grew no bound , the terror persisted .she took her pillow ,put it over her head and pressed the pillow hard over her ears , still she could not stop hearing that voice which called out her name again and again. What was more unbearable , the invisible pulled the pillow and dragged her off her bed . Now she could feel its physical presence too. But she dare not open her eyes. She was slapped ,once ..twice..thrice. when the pain outshone her fear ,she opened her eyes ,cried to her horror misery. And more because of the painful slaps her flatmate planted on her cheeks.

“vidhyaa vidhyaa , wake up – you are getting late for work” . her flatmate shouted .she looked at the clock that striked 9.

Not a big deal ,she is scared in a daily routine manner. Let it be some ghost ,nightmare or her boss..all the same . what is reality anyway??
RUN VIDHYA RUN!!

Bonded

There is no life,like graduation.
There is no life,after graduation.

FAREWELL

buses, trains, cars..
nethin' that runs ,
takes me away..
from ppl I love. 

FAITH

... fast asleep   on  ma terrace (it was a some winter morning and the sun was so(o)  comforting , and the breeze: comforting  indeed.)

... woke up when something  with the light current of air almost glued on ma face, it was a  piece of paper ..it seemed there was an attempt to tear it apart. But somehow the writer’s heart was unwilling so y it was just creased n crumpled..

  THE CONTENT -

++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++

Dear Naveen,

                                Before I could tell you  the facts about my life I would like to tell you my life witnessed a marvel : its you.  I remember when i lost faith in God. Looking up at the ceiling, I cried my eyes out.. I accused Him for the things that was happening to my life by then ,rather I charged Him from everything to everything.  Before I could educate myself in school , I  was out there learnin’ life’s lesson.

Why do I have to be faithful to Him ?? why do I always set a positive frame?? why can’t I go wrong??  And hence how I lost faith in  all - powerful.

But the very day I met you  , spoke with you , the times I spent with you – all my questions were answered. You - the   guardian  angel , the best surprise He had for me. The one who pulled me out of  melancholy world and hold me in your arms tight enough to let slip the memories  of havin’ a heart full of scars... HE choose you and you approved me.

But....

Everytime  I look deep down into your flawless eyes ,i see the depth of your love but they call into questions :

“ why are you a thinker , an astral dreamer? What lies behind those eyes?? What pain checks  your tears? What’s wrong ? what’s wrong??

I know these stuffs would sound you funny ,and you might say me to have a practical base in life. But I can’t face your silent queries   so why i want you to know everything about me . yes i’m a dreamer – to be with you was the only dream i ever had. .

I just ask for time and patience to read the next few pages.. yet  I know the consequences  - I  love you ...

 “everybody has a past and it depends on the person you share”. When the person is the one you

++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++

My sleep  transformed into a desperate thought  of “ what  next”..but that was the only page i was ordained  to read and wonder who could be my guardian angel??

Life of Abundance

How much does it takes to show your TRUE self
believing others , torn apart by their comments
soo ugly, soo wrong
noo light ,noo hope
a permanent lonliness -broken altogether
but haiz its just you clouded by your own judgement
turning a deaf ear to your inner soul
where is the strength within you -where??
afraid of dark you fall
look at the light thou shall rise
for you got hundred and fifty lovers
all the compliments for your smile,your sparkling eyes
take a step ahead but do turn back to see the indefinte followers
and its all because " you never give up"

A cloud of dust..

Not yet ready to face the crowd and stun the audience...(as i don wan u to dig ur own grave..lol)
so will just be a happy blogger for sometym.. Psst , i’m vegetarian by choice... how can i eat a tiger??
my head!!my headache!!
God bless you!!
love,
jasmin

warming up!!

Like you might start your day from an air conditioning room to an ac car then to a centralized ac office..well me n i think almost cent percent of the world is underprivileged for such a happy tan-free life.

we personally feel this something called "global warming", be it prerna who now just dreams to witness snowfall in her hometown- Shimla . or me, when i walk out in the sun feel roasted to the core.

 how about shantilata, lost her family in the super cyclone '99,orissa. being a survivor ,she is unaware of the cause behind the unpredictable heavy storm that ruined her life. She still believes that God was unhappy with her village.

Global warming is caused by green house gases ,which trap in the sun's infrared rays in the earth's atmosphere . The global warming has happened in the past few years and is evident from the rise in mean temperature of the earth's atmosphere.It has led to increase in mean earth temperature and thus melting of polar ice and also to the extinction of animals due to loss of their natural habitat or their inability to evolve to rapid changes in the temperature. There is shift in season cycle, as the summers are getting longer than the winters. global warming is also affecting the crop production, as the crops are getting destroyed by the sudden change in temperatures or sudden on set of rains.

"Better late than never" , its time to use our solution oriented skills - restoring trees and forests to degraded lands , an awareness among individuals , communities and other organizations to join the fight towards a change - a positive change.

JAI HO!!

from your FANs!!

Well  go back to the time, when you were a real die hard fan of someone ,may be for his/her certain characteristics .. how much of things have changed now... i used to be a fan of a person who was damn charmin’ , good lookin’  n all that.. perfecto!!  But when i  just kept on liking him ,he became quite a bore..well how.??..  u c it became like a chewing gum in my mouth..the more i chewed it ( admired him) ,it became more n more flavourless and also hurt ma jaws. Finally , there was no option left rather than to dispose it, take some time gap  n  put another one in my mouth... for chewing gumless mouth looks  so unkool ...*rofl* !!

Knock knock!!

Knock knock who??

Whoever  whoever  !!

M not a fan of yours.. may be a tubelight..?!

 

love story,is it?!

IIT ,Chennai...in the library... a girl carryin’  too many books which hid her face except for  her hazel brown eyes...stumbles upon a boy ..busy  rearrangin’  books and hearts... haiz they neva spoke a word except for  a sorry and a thank you.. again the same girl in the canteen.. the boy comes n  sits right opposite to her , speaks to her friend... the girl gets up and leaves ...

 the boy waits  for the girl every day outside her classroom...just to have a look ...secretly she liked him too..

Friends  arranged them to meet in the basket ball ground.. for they thought it was the most isolated place in their college..they spoke as if they knew eachother since a childhood, the conversation ended up to have a basket ball match... none of them cared who won the match... giggling ,laughing ..,both went their way... friends were disappointed seeing them playin’  instead of talking love stuffs..

Later on both became good friends ,and meet  frequently to play  basketball ... college finished ... everyone moved on in their life..

SOME 20 YEARS LATER...

My uncle went to iit Chennai ...he was proud his son could make it to the same iit ,where he studied..he dropped his son in the hostel premises..then went to the basket ball ground... something made him smile ,may be he time travelled back n  reached his college days... he then went back to his son ,who was having a conversation with  his professor ,a lady ..she turned  to greet my uncle...

 face wrinkled,  hair too short ,but the same hazel brown eyes he saw  that day in the library...

everyone moved on in their life...

p/s: ma aunt reads ma blog... lol...

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

Marry me for thy shall have the best kids

the  amazingly  beautiful lady asked the brilliant scientist “ marry me ..for  our child will have your brains and ma  looks”

The scientist as eva with his doubts “ what if the child gets ma looks and your brains??”

Hmm

 Why is that a short is attracted by someone’s tallness!!

Why whites tan themselves and why blacks  n dusky ppl use fairness creams!!

Why  ppl with straight hair likes it to be curled  and vice versa...

Why a geek   falls in love with a freak ...

Soo..All we want is a child with a perfect blend of genes... Sab  khel  hai baby... uwaaaa ...be prepared*winks*..

 

Or may be i’m talkin’ nonsense... who knows may be not...

 

GOD BLESS!!

 

I AM...

When listens , a THINKER

When speaks ,a ORATOR

When sees , a BELIEVER

When believes , a FOLLOWER  

 

When happy,  a DREAMER

When sad,  a LIAR

 When hurt, a LONER

When  rejected, a MOURNER

 

When laughs, a JOKER

When promotes, a ADMIRER

When “YOU”, a LOVER

When  “ME”, a RULER

Embarrassin' !!

...then i was in the elevator to reach my floor..saw this cute short girl holdin’ some around may be a huge bunch of bread packets( excuse moi just an estimation, its obvio i didn’t count them..)..... too much lil baby, why do have to take soo much and waste..when you can get them the next day in the mess... but whateva was too much ... like seriously , i don’t like ppl wasting thing ... i mean this can be given to someone who cant afford them ( i agree i neva made an attempt to take the excessive flow of food from the mess to the ppl outside toiling in the university garden n else whe)..n i agree we don’t like our mess food but there are ppl who can only just dream of havin’ it... a serious problem , nothing is equally distributed... from water to food... some cant afford it and some have surplus to waste... so lets not take an advantage of our place where we get much more than enough and fall into habit of wastin’ things...
So y i decided to give this girl a sarcastic look and sarcastic smile...

The elevator stopped at ma floor , oh she lives in ma floor..lol neva knew her name.. m kinda snob else shez not so popular to be known...whateva!!
What happened next??... she went near the staircase gave the bunch of bread to the sweepers . the sweepers lined up cheered thank u n all .. i looked back at her to give a “great job” smile...

Ya got back something .. a sarcastic smile and a sarcastic look...

p/s: a very important lesson of ma life.. ppl have their needs and necessities ... everyone has a different unique way of doin things ..let them work their own way...

After -Happy post!!

There are numerous things for why m quite a happy nowadays....few  reasons are very much overt and few are undercover ...so here it is at random...

I’m happy seeing ma balance..thanks dad

Got in touch with two lifetime best buddies...

Almost Booked ticket to leave SRM the very next day of finals( waitin’ list )

Classes though borin’ still goin’ hilarious...thanks to ma bench mates...

Got few followers  to the blog ..out of which two are ma friends..haripriya and Rajeev ... *chuckles*

Amitha – ma roomie,  got through kings university...happy for her she will meet her  love after a year in London...

Heard that tcs will give  call letter by max September..yippeee..independent..

to some  lecturer  i explained ma final year project... kinda gave me more of  confidence ....

 .......................................................

And as i said few stuffs  can’t be revealed....*winks*

 

X0X0

Squared away!!

Few  years back ma aunt ..astrologer and ya kinda physic ,   told me that m a freak... too much of thoughts approach me in all direction... i need to do yoga n all that for concentration... so anyways..

Badly  wants  to leave this place...4yrs ...c’mon... i ‘m glad its over and sad it happened ....seriously don care if you think me a snob or  whateva..a deep serious  feelin’ not to like ma col n ppl ...so don’t you wrong or right me... ... perfectly arranged n  organized for a new life and all set to handle selfish-giri and use-giri and all sorts of ppl

Dear mrs.physic  aunt  was soo correct... impossible for me to stay at a place esp where ppl are not like me in short good ppl ( a bit atleast)... call me unstable...well  then thats  what i’m..  when  i like some ppl for their certain characteristic , when the boredom  with the same ppl  reaches a height( not even its peak)... i  deappreciate them from their hair to socks... sometimes  they ask for iodine to their wounds.. like whateva not ma fault..in the first place i get bored with the people with whom i loose ma trust ... do whateva you can’t gain it back...the best thing that makes me my  favourite is that when i expect something out of someone(obviously frm close ones)  and if it doesn’t  happen within a certain time (too short though) ,i just move on ..and later on  when it happens i just love kickin’ it...   

 

Just wish  this final sem  goes well...hello!! m talkin about the grades not ppl..

 

Was it rude??sooo

Anybody there still reading..!!

Bits and pieces...

I remember  to have  changed some six schools.. ,my dad gotta  frequent transferrable job ( so why i’m inspired neva to do a government job.. esp customs )...whateva ..like changin’ school  has been till now the worst thing that happened to me.. once i get a good set of frenzs ,it would  always be the  tym to leave them...  but the best  thing that happened to me was i always gotta a perfect set of friends.. like we’ re birds of same feathers flockin’ together... lucky me!!

As a child i had too much of emotions attached to ma frenzs ,so everytym i left a school , i would always cry my eyes out... i no its tough to believe if  i say i'm in touch with  ma good frenz  startin’ from school 1...  after all why are social networkin’ sites for!! ..

Now its almost tym to leave ma grad school ,... lemme tell you ..grad skool neva had any sort of emotional bondage with anyone... it was  complete fun freak...cant measure frenz as who all were best  but certainly were coolest of all ....  still lucky me!!

 It would be lame to say i wont miss ma col days..even its hard for me to figure it out. ..may be because i have been through so many farewell n all that stuff.. but will obviously  let you know how much will i miss it?.. in some blog after few months or years may be.. as i feel this blog is with me since forever..

CIAO!!

OBJECT LESSON!!

The oaf stumbled over the bucket and spilled all the water..so what !!...the oaf got a practical lesson.. what he got is a practical illustration of his mistake... i don’t want others to tell me what is good and what is bad... i just want to learn it myself... the senses mostly the common sense which i have developed and will develop in future with all my experiences in life.. i have seen many people deliberately forcing  by their speech or action to scare me away from  the things i was interested in ...all they want you is to go their way... why learn from others experience.. you might be the difference or you might become the tough one if you survive  it.... i am not capable of being influenced by anyone’s intellect , emotions or morals until and unless i share the same thought..

Everyone is gifted - but some people never open their package .

 

5 worst fears!!

1.         1.SOFTWARE JOB:  Doin’  a software job whole ma lyf which ll lead to  mutation at a gene level and ll be inherited by my future generations and they cant rest their hand  without a mouse..i can neva develop a interest in software ..A dead life...sheesh!!

2.       2.ARRANGE MARRIAGE:  not only  my family is orthodox so y i have to do arrange marriage ,its also because  i ‘m not in love yet.... the other day when ma mom said that she will get me married after two years..which means if  i ever  get commited to ma type guy, i need to find him before one year atleast, ( ma time starts now..tick tick) ... puhleez i can’t manage with a complete stranger... and i got to know hell lotta before marryin’ him...

3.       3.DELIVERY PAIN: I love kids and ll obviously want to have a replica ..i mean the baby me who ll grow up to look somewhat like me ( as i look like ma mom)..anyways the fear part is deliverin’ a baby .. i have  heard , read and believe  its the most  painful job in the world...gawd!! m’ getting a panic attack now don’t know about then!! ..this is the  fear which i can overcome  only after its done...

4.       4.TRUE LOVE: What if there is something called true love and i meet  him after  marrying  someone else..(so why i always pretend to disagree with the soul mate concept...)

5.      5. FORGETTIN’ : I have a best friend (the only one) whom i have not seen since four years ... everytime we make a plan to meet up,it gets cancelled .. what if we could neva meet  again ..and as i grow older  my mind ll eventually erase the thought of havin’ best friend..

 

p/s: chill la.. i’m scared of  almost half  the world...

                                                

 

THE STORY OF A GIRL (contd)

According to lata ,revati was a fast growing child ,crawling ,walking and talking was everything quite perfect when reva was just one. And later revati neither complained nor demand any stuff like the all other neighbours’ kid. Revati always caught her crying in front of the flowered photograph of her father. Lata sat there long hours looking at the photogragh.

 Revati’ father jharia lal  owned a grocery store. One day he was returning  home after closing his grocery store, he tried to cross the railway track when the signal was red. The train ran over him. Lata could not even distinguish the body parts.everyone sympathized but jharia lal became a legend and mothers warned their children to follow all rules else they will die like jharia lal.

 Lata was three months pregnant . jharia lal had a cunning set of brothers. They lied lata about the grocery running at a loss. They sold the store. And a small part of it was given to lata. Although lata found out the truth she never rebelled rather  she was not in a condition , she was pregnant. And every day she grew weak but someone inside her gave her the strength to live. REVA.

The "XX"

[Note: perverts banned readin’]


We the women community of the world, feel and fall for everything which a man can never notice in his life time... Well, never ask us “how are we”..as we can never be fine cause we lie a lot as we even cry for the microorganism that dies crushed under our feet... when she says she is fine..she is just not fine.. like most of the men believe their girl- to- be should be good looking ,smart n all that..a woman has no such criteria ,rather she wants someone irrespective of looks to love the tender qualities she has, show her a quality of your kindness ,there she ll be waitin’ just for you... women are intelligent ,unlike men they know looks will sag and wrinkle someday....its funny how a man says “ she is the perfect one for me”.... how naive!!.. perfect is a synonym for woman... a flawless creation ..the one who knows you more than yourself ( its not philosophical ..all you ppl out there ..i bet there is a women in your life who saved your soul..for whom you are on the right track ..As role of -a mother –a sister – a friend- a wife –a guide...didn’t you find her at all stages of your life??
she has a huge heart to dissolve all your mistakes...and multiples her love for you....
All you men truly in their one sided love ( i can understand you ppl are huge in numbers) must be wonderin’- Why do we take time to say a “yes”-
Well, if we ask for some time then its obvious that we are already in love with you , and when we says “yes” ..then its a promise of lifetime...and for all those lucky men who heard their part of “yes” ...soon when you see her are walkin’ down the aisle .. do not get a panic attack about your future because shez the one with many avatars ...and has always played a perfect role..as.. the girl - the woman - the lady .
p/s: to all my soul sisters ... happy women’s day.

What if i was ?

I certainly have met people who know exactly what they want.. my friend Jacob dropped two years after 12th to get through medicine and he did get it..by the time he ll pass out of the college , he wont have any regret in life..becoz he did what he always dreamt of.. but those who were scared to drop years , and had a deep desire to become a doctor but lacked patience and changed field to something else , said “lucky chap Jacob”
And few ppl even after joinin’ some different field ,soon realised where they went wrong and went on with their dreams..like sameer who found music practically revolvin’ around him and he was born to be a DJ.. and he was correct ..within a year, he went on givin numerous shows around the world...i don’t think he needs a degree now...but the important thing is- he is lovin’ his job.. and like Jacob ,he has no regrets either ..
And few ppl went on with the flow, wherever life took them..they eventually brought up a interest to the field which obviously was not their first choice...so what.. those ppl are doing pretty good..like madhuri who always wanted to be a doctor.. but she is neither unhappy nor does she regrets doing b.tech genetic engineering...she finds it more interestin’ and thinks she was lucky to get in this field... so there shez happy and ya she is the topper of her department..
And here is me..may be some ppl like komal are also included in this ... i always wanted to do - i know in what i’m interested in .. what i’m studyin’ rite na is of no interest to me... why even i choose this field... do i really hav any knowledge what i study each semester..here i ‘m aimless n soon will be jobless after graduation..i got nothing out of this field except for wasting ma parents money - socialising and partyin’. .
To conclude on ma present dilemma - i ‘m still optimistic ...even though m not givin’ any effort as i seriously lack the guts to dispose ma graduation degree and choose the field of my interest..
But In the end, no one not even me myself can stop the dreams that comes naturally to become what i always wanted to be.. kinda natural tendency for a “ catch as a catch can” situation... which means the situation where every person advances his own interest , trying to get as much as possible of what he needs or wants himself...
p/s: to jasmin and those ppl like her..all the best..tension lene ka nahi...a long way to go dudes n dudettes..

That STRANGER!!

Three and a half years back when we joined this college called SRM university, everyone was a neophyte,we were all stranger to each other.. then we spoke and fell into groups and gangs.. then we had loadz of frenz ,mutual friends ,seniors, juniors..that we almost knew everyone of our depatment by their names( atleast the popular ones)…like we recognize them as good dancers, toppers, freaks ,geeks buggers etc etc…
What about those ppl whom we could never know by their name, have no mutual friends .. but they share some special moments which is difficult to forget..CONFUSED??
Ok for example… the stranger who smiled at you and went inside the mba block … and a second n third and numerous meeting in biotech canteen, corridors ,some lab..and a specific in front of 501 classroom..you develop some feeling which need a higher degree of understandin’ ..somehow this eyes and smile chemistry changes a bit of your emotional equation ..you realize there is some bond between you and the stranger.. meetin him again and again at different places makes you feel as if you know him perfectly as a person… but what you only know is : this stranger has a perfect smile..people interpret their own way..crush ,infatuation ,lust..etc etc… excuse moi ..doesn’t smile and eyes define love!! ..what eva I’m not categorizing it as love..or any of the stuff that ppl think …its just some weird feelin’…
Anyways … well this stranger even makes you smile back at him to make the bond a bit more stronger… when you do not see him for days ,months ..you start missin him ( symptoms of love as they say)…
Then one fine day you find a entirely different set of ppl infront of that 501 classroom… and so how the next moment you know that you are not goin to meet him again…the whole definition of stranger changes.. you search him in networkin’ sites..facebook, orkut… but haiz ,we never knew their name… yet we wish a destiny to meet him somewhere in our later part of life….
Moral – approach someone.. remember few years back your friends were strangers too!!!

THE BOOK AND NOT ITS COVER!!

There was this lady I met in train while I was going to Bhubaneswar with a friend … as soon as this lady board the train, everybody noticed her.. several reasons.. she was hyper active, wearin’ a saree < some hundred rupees cotton discount handloom saree and with a unusual loud high pitched voice …every one lauged their heart out..esp the bengali couple right next to my seat.. this lady had no reservation ..as it was five in the evenin’ n I was not sleepin’ …the lady asked me if I can take my luggage out from the upper berth so that she can sleep for an hour or two as she will get down at Bhubaneswar ( my station too)… everybody giggled .. the begali couple giggled the most… the lady again asked me a favor to give her some water to drink.. I gave her water n a smile… the Bengali man commented “ what else could we do for you mam??”..the lady gave him a stary look ,climbed up to the upper berth n slept… the Bengali couple went on n on commentin’ “ oh ma no reservation .. relaxin happily ,waste ,dirty women n blah blah bakwass “
Seriously , this couple was irritatin from the start and bullyin’ this lady ( which was none of their business ,c’mon she didn’t even bother them ) added on to ma nerves ..above all boss ,I do know Bengali!!!damn Irritatin’ !!! I turned to my friend and with an insulting voice I said(in English) “ why can’t ppl just mind their own stuff..and some ppl do not know how to behave esp with a lady!!! Such kick a** ppl suck!! And they think their humor works!! Oh well fu*k off then it will only works with your humorless wife…!!”
So this is it!! They prolly understood . a long quite silence ( afta sucha long time!! )…GOOD
sometimes like poison kills poison..comments kill comments…I don’t feel bad.. elder should mend their ways too ( speaking ,commentin’ esp the way of thinking ).. the lady woke up ,came down, asked me the newspaper I was readin’ .. I gave her newspaper ,a smile and “I fought for you and I own” look..she smiled back.. oh my!! this lady was talkative.. but was talkin’ knowledge.. her india tour and half of the countries in the world, her iitian daughter.. and above all she was a doctor by profession… I was just listenin’ the Bengali couple stated giggling again.. this time they laughed at me too for listenin’ to this lady..i don’t know why ppl got this wave of disbelief that tis lady spoke nonsense… ah finally it was bbsr station , we got down… “bbyes” n went on…
Outside the station while I was negotiatin’ with an auto driver..a mercedes stopped just next to me… the door opened .. this was this lady who pulled my luggage inside n offered me a ride home… I agreed ( who want to miss a Mercedes ride) ..then there was just two things in my mind…
“ simplicity personified “ ..simple livin’ n high thinkin’ is what we call success…judge the person and not the looks..
Second thougt “ the Bengali couple sucked..losers!! hah!!”*hates*

PS: i could have seen someone after a year... but missed his call *sobs*

THE DIVINE COMEDY!!

I’waitin’ ... it took me really long time to juxtapose between the two events and compare them.. mornin’ was normal...n now m here... my right leg hurts ,i think multiple fracture... my eyes are almost sproutin out with sticky dried blood stains..and there is a disbalance of  speakin  ,hearing and reacting..yes a brain damage perhaps... i could pass through all the objects like i do not exist.. well all this stuff proved ..I’M DEAD..

I fell down the spiral stairs of my block.. rolling down, i hit my head several times..i never had a clairvoyant warning earlier ( or what they call a death call)...i never got the chance to  make my bucket list before dying...

After a long wait someone with a unicorn like helmetman came near me n said “he wants to meet you”..

“who” i asked *oh f*** my jaws  hurts too*

The helmet man gave me a lacklusture smile..came very near n said “ YAMRAJ”...oh so this is it... i followed him... as i entered inside it was the shabbiest place i have ever seen in ma earthly life..i saw   more of unicorn helmet men throwin’ ppl inside something boiling ..may be water.. no on earth they say its oil..and ppl screamin’ ,few apologizing and few admitting n regretting their earthly mistakes... we kept on walkin’ until there was a tank of something boilin’ ..again a lacklusture smile...

“noo ..i want to meet yamraj  and clarify ..wait “ i screamed (kinda my name is khan style..like wan to meet the president n am not a terrorist..)

The helmentman  grabbed me with all his force..the grip was so tight n hypnotic...that  i willingly jumped into whateva boiling tank...

Wait do want to know what happened next... well guys i woke up...just a NIGHTMARE dudes n dudettes..

Thanks for reading this ( if u gave it a full read..lol),,:P

p/s: today is valentine’s day . just a another normal day for me.,*sobs*

ran-dumb-ness

Its  exactly 3:20am. I’m nocturnal.. i mean a night person(hostel life u c)...a lil later i was thinking to study  something for my upcoming GATE exam ( mind u it was just a thought without any effort) ..whateva,the present thought is .. valentines day... loser again!!.. just imagine i neva had a valentine in my life ( nothing to imagine..there are gazillons of Indian girls who  ll never get the  guts to fall in love..includin’ me.. family n all that u c)..but i was in a r’ship, it didn’t last till any one of the 14^th feb ( m not sad for this one)... this month , every year, i always try to convince maself..the best love story is yet to be written , for Indians everyday is a  valentine’s day n all that...c’mon accept the fact.. all we after teen  singles go on dates n increase our social networkin’ just to find , matter of any chance or some luck to meet our perfect guy..(wait, did i just say perfect..no la just ma types will do)..prolly  ill find him someday(when!!how??)..*sighs*...

And for this 14^th , i ‘ll be quite busy writin GATE.. which reminds me to study somethin’ rite na..

Nooho ..*yawns* *yawns again?* n again...

GOOD NITE lah!!! *yawnin’ continues*

 

LAMO!! LOST IN REVERIE!!!

enough of blogs on imagination , case studies, observation n blah blah..

there got to be a blog on ME!! why not!! 

there are some facts and truths that lies enclaved in my brain but obviously can not reveal all of it.. sorry ( hah!! like you care  whateva i think)...its my blog so i can write whateva..(a actual sorry )

well some portion of my brain has a veritable cornucopia of information, knowledge ( not sure of that).and some portion is lame as a couch potato "IDLE" denies to think anything.. turns it back when hears something that it can't relate to something called "SENSE"....

when great scientist divide brain into two halves ..the right "R"and the left"L" (won't annotate on that ,in simple words "no comments")..

my brain has a antiseptic effect for over emotions , repulsion towards melodramatic people ( n n n  the winner is some ekta kapoor's soap..lol)..hey why m i callin my brain as my brain .. its like calling your lovin' pet dog as a dog... so i should name my brain ..ahh lemme think... bruno,tiffiny, browny..oh for god sake jasmin these are ahh leave think of something else.. gocha!!

yes LAMO( this is not derived from any latin word..its derived from english ..a nick name to lame... wonderin' well no body likes to be called so.. thats why .. so this LAMO is an endangered speices ..it has no friends..no one to match its thoughts ...

lamo  thinks if desires and emotions can be sublimated..

lamo is never hurt..but survives it!!

"missin' someone" lamo needs a huge word than impractical to describe it....

lamo has also agreed to mention about its sixth sense..lamo is ubiquitous and has telepathic power..the telepathy is rusted as lamo  is last of this type...

now u must be thinking lamo's resources to survive in this world ...

well  if i tell u to read the first line of the blog..(enough of blog on imagination , case studies, observation n blah blah)... lamo knows nothing other than this for its survival even though its sarcastic at times..now seriously enough of ME..

DIRTY DATING!!!

 Mishti jain , a 21 year graduate from delhi university. Smart, intelligent and confident were the synonym for Misthi jain. Mishti experienced everything in her life in always a extreme way. Her parents were divorced when she was eight, so how she experienced extreme sadness. Happiness is something she felt now. few days back.. when her friend anuradha gave vishal( anuradha’s cousin) mishti’s cell number after mishti complimented vishal’s  looks on their family album. Vishal was eager to speak because any vaccation he comes to anuradha’s place ,like a chatter box anuradha spoke to him about mishti.. So inshort anuradha was the cupid !!!! They spoke over phone for long hours. Vishal couldn’t help but fall in love with her witty talks and smart replies. He knew it was her.. the perfect lady of his life. Mishti on the other hand was very practical, she thought it is impossible to love someone over phone.. THE DATE.. MISHTI and vishal sat together.. they odered cocktail ,starter..vishal kept on speaking … misthi couldn't even speak..she felt very uneasy sitting in front of the person.. who was of course a complete stranger(she never counted him a phone friend)..vishal was too good looking, his smile wrinkled till his eyes..sparky attractive guy ..but mishti could not think of anything else but to leave the place..vishal tried his best to make her feel good..but mishti was sweating outta nervousness.. mishti excused herself out of the place ..vishal on the other hand never believed if it was the same smart and confident mishti he spoke over phone.. What happened with mishti  was an anxiety syndrome when the conversation was just limited to technologies like –cell phone or chatting.. this is better known as “Modern female dating anxiety syndrome”

THE STORY OF A GIRL-1

She looked up. Although the drizzling rain pricked , it gave her  indefinite pleasure. The pleasure of feeling the rain drops all over her body , the water made its way from her eyes to mouth, she raised her hands the water came rolling to wet the rest of her body. She stayed there awestruck ,this was the first time she understood this rain feeling. when the drizzle changed to heavy rain , she opened her  umbrella , swinging and swirling in all the directions, just  to make  mimic one of the girl from the television,  she admired her, cause  the girl seemed so happy dancing in the rain. Now she realised it gave her happiness too, immense happiness.

Revati  is happy.

“ reva reva “ lata screamed seeing revati.  As she came closer ,revati ran away from her. The three year and a twenty four year race was obviously not fair. Revati was caught , but lata’s anger had disappeared. Lata  was long cooled when she discovered the glaze of happiness in her daughter’s eyes. They both enjoyed the rain.

Lata and revati are happy.

MY LOVE/CRUSH DON'T COST A THING-2

Nothing can be as stupid as not to let your feelings out. Well its not easy when the curry or rather a irish stew of one way track love puts on the age old blanket of ego over you... The sad toast to life was that he left,.. yaa farewell.. senior!!!!...no more secret stares not even a glance           

 sob sob…

sob sob..

 

the second last page of my small Barbie diary with a tic tac locking system... where I filled every where with half hearts.. and thought why I’m not lucky .. unlucky enough..or being lucky- no time for love..hah.!                                  

komal sat there staring at me, she raised her brow’s “ what the  old loser’ love story or rather crush story”..and was laughing her a** off… it was only she who found the words funny…for me the words pierced my heart to break it further more..…

“ u knw I ll miss him too, I miss the vintage love u had for  him , and the way u blushed like a crazy fool..hahahha..”

she came to me n saw the half hearts “oh u poor thing”

I bursted into tears and heavy sob… “ you are correct , I am a bigtime loser.. only a loser like me can have this age and lengthy crush.. but to tell u its neither flirt nor obsession..leave it!! pyaar impossible!!”….

                                                              (to be contd..)